I have found incontrivertible proof that I have improved as an artist. This should of course be a good thing, but it's actually crushingly, horrifically embarrassing. I didn't think much could embarrass me, but it turns out that "Me from the past" can do it without even trying.
I found a fanart that I drew a couple of years - and it is apalling. I don't mean "bad" or "I do better now" - I mean it looks like something a well meaning but unfortunately retarded child would draw, painstakingly and over the course of several hours and a number of chewed crayons. Worst, I didn't just draw this; I drew it, liked it, and e-mailed it to the subject (who was kind enough to respond nicely and NOT dispatch trained assassins to torture me to death).
Since then I've developed a number of abilities which have helped me no end:
- Actually studying anatomy
- Using multiple drawings and attempts to learn and produce a piece, stretched over more than one sitting
- Actually throwing out the awful, awful drawings without ever showing them to anyone.
I can only hope the subject never again attachs my name to that work, and that over the rest of my life I can devote myself to producing Ein Masterwork which can compensate. And perhaps be sent back in time, to erase the first.
Embarrassment = Progress!